Being a frequent traveler, I can just about do any of the flight attendant messages verbatim. That would have been useful for the other passengers on this morning's flight since the woman who was doing them sounded like the Charlie Brown teacher .  All I could make out was "wah wah wah wah seat belt", "wah wah wah wah landing."

Her sidekick on the other hand was a total ringer for Queen Latifah, both looks-wise as well as her voice. I was tempted to ask her to do a number from Chicago for us but didn't think she'd find the humor in it.  For a minute, I thought maybe I can convince her since the Charlie Brown teacher could easily master the background "doo wops."

As all these things were whirling through my head, Queen Latifah came by to tell us to be sure to hold E tight during takeoff and landing (thank you, hadn't thought about that) and CBT(Charlie Brown Teacher) was informing us over the intercom that infant life vests are located at the back of the plane. Sitting in row 3, I envisioned how running back 30 rows would play out in the event of a water landing. My guess is, we'd rather not find out.

Finally, as she got to the point about instructing people how to slide down the slide in the event of a water landing, I had to bite my tongue not to add on a reminder to keep those hooker heels up high or you'll pop that damn slide and none of us will make it out alive!